when the working day is done, oh girls... they wanna have fun

The past month has been a complete beeyotch, workwise. I spend nine to twelve hours a day working, most of those hours in meetings, and then trying frantically to catch up with all the work that didn't get done during the aforementioned snooze sessions. By the time the weekend rolls around I'm faced with mountains of household chores that need done, a yard turning into a jungle, and a little man that wants to suck up as much time with his "old, fun" mommy as he can.

One of the yearly requirements for all employees of The Winnebago is to complete a series of mandatory training. They make it very convenient for us by providing the classes on-line so we can do them whenever, and wherever, we find the time. Time is the one thing I don't have nearly enough of, so... Do you see the problem here?

The other day management sends us a gentle reminder to complete our classes that reads something like this:

"...if not already completed, please work on the mandatory training. I find
taking them during boring meetings kills two birds with one stone."

Uh, okay. So what you're saying is we shouldn't need to pay attention in the meeting therefore nullifying our need for attending in the first place? Okay, yeah!

For the record, I won't be getting to any of those "mandatory trainings" anytime soon. In fact next week, I won't be getting to very much work at all. I am taking a few hours off (I say hours cuz I'll still be monitoring email periodically and attending required meetings) to spend some much needed girl time with her majesty. She'll be here in two days. W00t!!

We've kept the schedule pretty open at this point but I can assure you there will be a lot of Rock Band/Guitar Hero playing, beer drinking, movie watching, pool playing, yakking, smoking, visiting the carnies, eating, shopping and otherwise girlish fun for 5 straight days. Because when the working day is done, oh girls... they wanna have fun. Oh girls, just wanna have fun!

hello good-bye

The phone doesn't usually ring at 10:40pm at my house. Well, on occassion, but not on a Monday night. Anyway while Stace and I were vegging out watching Friday after our little arts-n-crafts time the phone rings. WTH? Guess who it was? My little man!

I knew they were flying in last night and scheduled to arrive at 9:18pm so I figured he was just calling to say they'd landed and would see me tomorrow (which is today). But no. A couple of minutes into the conversation he informs me his father is bringing him home. Right then. At almost 11:00pm which is of course 2:00am to his body. WTF??? Now don't get me wrong, I was thrilled after not seeing him for nearly two weeks, but seriously. No communication. What if I was already in bed and didn't hear the phone? What if I simply wasn't here?

He pulled up fifteen minutes to midnight and came running as fast as his feet could carry him into my arms. It was so good to hold my little man again. Then we went in and he was so surprised to see Stace he started screaming. The dog went completely ballistic and wouldn't get more than 12 inches away from him, and actually slept on the floor at the foot of WJ's bed all night. He never sleeps upstairs at night. Think he missed his boy?

So we all headed to bed a little after midnight and tried to get some quick sleep so we could get up in the morning to take Stace to the airport. With our altered plans now having to drop the kiddo at summer camp we were out the door by 7:15am, first to drop off WJ, then stop to pick-up Groove who was nice enough to drive with us so I could use the HOV lane on the way back, off to the airport, back to work, summer camp pick-up, quick stop at Safeway, and then finally home. Sheesh! Makes me tired just writing about it.

It's awfully quiet without my friend here tonight. We had so much fun!! Tons of laughter, good talks, silliness, a PS2 marathon, movies, some special arts-n-crafts (hope you guys like your stuff!), and just an all around great time. The time went by way too quickly, and it always sucks when you have to say good-bye and have no idea when you'll see each other again. I already miss you, my friend!!

As I was typing the previous paragraph Stace called (of course she did) to let me know she'd landed.

Anywho, life rolls on and the party's over for now. But I know there'll be another in the very near future.

it's a beautiful day in this neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor

Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?

Anyone of you wonderful people looking to move? I'm looking for some new neighbors and I'd like to hand pick the best of them. I sat and watched my property value decrease last night, which may or may not be a good thing, but that's a whole other story.

I know you remember my letter to Mrs. A. If not, click here and catch up. Well the animals were uncaged again last night. Actually, they've been uncaged for the past two or three nights, but last night evil spawn child was up to his old nastiness. Hitting. And hitting a girl nonetheless. Oh yeah. Screaming in his whiney tone and then hitting another neighbor girl not once, but three times. She hit him back (hehe). But the madness didn't stop there. The fight was over who was going to drive this. That's right, a Barbie jeep. And guess who this jeep belonged to? Yup, the neighbor girl who was getting hit.

And where was Mrs. A during this outburst. She was pulling weeds in her front yard. The one time she is actually out there to witness the insanity and she does nothing. Acted as if she couldn't hear or see any of what was going on. Even when the neighbor girl told her evil spawn was hitting she just told him to sit down. That lasted all of 30 seconds when he jumped up to follow the girls into the house. Did she call him back outside? Give him a timeout? Lecture him about hitting? Of course she didn't.

But wait, there's more.

Some thirty minutes or so later all the same kids, and the same jeep, are now down at the back end of the loop we live on. In the jeep. In the middle of the road. With a pickup truck coming around the loop one way, and a minivan coming the other. And what do they do? Just sit/stand there and make the cars figure out how to get around them. Can you guess who was driving?

At that point my good neighbor was out mowing his lawn. He sees the cars, hears the kids, stops the mower and just stares down the road. Then he looks across the street at me. We both shake our heads and then have this short little conversation.

Me: "Well, I'm glad to see your daughter isn't down the street with the stoopids!"
Him: "No way!"
Me: "Yeah, cuz it's always smart for a plastic toy car to take on a pickup and minivan in the middle of the road."
Him: "When you don't have any parental guidance, what do you expect!?"

Oh, by the way, Mrs. A was still in her front yard weeding while we were yelling across the street having this conversation. She didn't even look up. I swear I think the doctor must have prescribed meds for the evil spawn, and instead of giving them to him, she's taking them herself.

But wait, there's still more.

For the past few weeks, the neighbors behind my nextdoor neighbors have decided it's okay to sit out on their patio between the hours of midnight at 2am smoking, talking, laughing, squealing and basically making too much noise. That combined with the little pug they have being chained up in the backyard barking and crying to come in at 3am has made for some not so good sleeping nights as of late.

Last night I was wiped. I actually went to bed before 10pm for the first time in weeks and was sound asleep when what do my sleepy ears hear? The noisemakers. At 1am. Normally I just shut my windows and turn on the ceiling fan to drown out the noise, but last night was so muggy there was no way I was closing myself in. So, I sat up and hollered "Shut up!"

At first they quieted down, immediately. But, of course, now I was wide awake, so I decided to get up and pee. No sooner had I gotten back into bed they're at it again, only this time louder. The exchange went something like this.

Me: "Shut up!" (more loudly this time than the first)
Them: "No! You shut up."
Me: "Some of us have to get up at 5am and don't appreciate being woken in the middle of the night."
Them: "Then shut your window."
Me: "Hell no! STFU or go inside."
Them: "Fuck you."
Me: "Whatever. Consider this your warning that I'm calling the cops."
Them: "Go ahead bitch."

With that I was more than wide awake. But they were quiet. And I assume they must have thought about it more and decided they probably didn't want the cops coming over cuz they got up, quickly put their butts out, and scrambled inside. Me? I lay down, tossed and turned for half an hour, then went downstairs to smoke a butt of my own. I think I finally fell back to sleep a little after 2am.

Won't you please?
Won't you please?
Please won't you be my neighbor?

TUN (Totally Unrelated Note): Guess what today is? It's PARTY time!!! That's right, in less than 12 hours the party's starting when I pick up Stace at the airport. Woo hoo!!! I am so looking forward to having her here. Don't know what's on tap for the weekend yet, but maybe we'll make a little noise. Hehe!

TGIF!!!

what was it I was just saying?

What was that I was saying the other day? Something about not having anything to write about? Uh... yeah. You'd think I'd learn my lesson about posting stuff like that. But noooo! I had to go and open that can of worms. Didn't I?

First, thanks to all of you who not only read my whining but actually left me comments and suggestions. You gave me the warm fuzzies because frankly I figured ya'll probaby gave up on me and got tired of coming over here to see nothing new. You like me! You really like me!!

Anyway, as my life goes, whenever I lay things out on the line, like saying there was nothing worth writing about, all sorts of things just start gelling. Take yesterday for example. During my lunch break not one but two blog worthy stories came up during conversations with co-workers. I was really excited to come home, get the normal shit of the day done, and plunk myself down in front of the computer to write. Except life had other plans for me. So these two stories and using some of the suggestions from my adoring fans will have to wait for another day. Today I tell you about my Friday night adventure at home.

It started off as a typical Friday evening - leave work, drive home through the massive downpour that decided to come down right in the middle of rush hour causing traffic to back up for miles in both directions of the Interstate, pick up the kiddo, hang with him for awhile, then yak on the phone with my girl Stace. Sounds boring enough, eh? Well don't run off yet. This is where it gets good. Or bad. It all depends on how you look at it.

If I'm not roaming around the house doing laundry or cleaning up the kitchen I'm usually pacing between the garage and the living room when I'm talking on the phone. I hang outside smoking then retreat to the quiet of the living room for awhile so I don't have to listen to the teevee and play noises. Anyway, last night I was sitting on the sofa in the living room. It runs the length of the long wall and faces the wall of the front door entry with the actual front door to the left. As we're yakking about whatever something caught my eye - the trim around the front door. From my position on the sofa something looked amiss. Like the trim, or the door, was warped or something. And no I wasn't drunk. I was only on my first beer.

I stood up and walked to the door for closer inspection and as I approached I realized that the entire door frame where the chain lock is attached and draped over to the front door was pulled out from the wall. WTF? Completely off the wall. So far off the wall that the tiny little nails used to hold it up had about a quarter inch between the ends of them and the backside of the trim. At this point I interrupt whatever Stace is saying and tell her what I'm looking at. It completely baffled me because 1) my parents were just here for a week so there was always someone around the house during the entire day and night and if they'd had any mishaps with the front door they not only would have told me, but would have made sure it was fixed better than it'd been before they left to go back home, 2) we rarely ever use the front door since I park the car in the garage and we just come in through the laundry room, and 3) with a dog like my Jake, someone would have to really want in bad to go through the trouble of trying to get past him.

With no damage to the door, inside or out, and the door being double locked (deadbolt and all), and the chain still attached to both the trim and the door, it was baffling. Besides me, there are only three others who have a key to the house - my parents (previously exhonerated), my neighbor who was watching my kiddo all week before and after summer camp, and my ex (long story why, and not something I'll discuss here). So I asked WJ if they (him, the neighbor, the neighbor's kids, or any or all of the above) had tried to get into the house at all during the day while I was at work. Nope. Wasn't them. So that left only two other options. The ex, or someone who somehow got a key to my house or knows how to pick a lock AND relock the door when they're done.

At this point Stace suggests that I call the police. I debated on this one for two reasons. First, I hate calling the police because you always have to call the 911 number and then explain that's it's not "really" an emergency as emergencies are classified but that you really do need to talk to someone or you wouldn't have called them in the first place. I wish they had a non-emergency number for situations like this. And second, I'd already been home for like 2 hours when I'd discovered this and being that I was fine, WJ was fine, and nothing seemed to be missing from the house it seemed a little strange to get the police involved. Despite my reservations I called them. And you know what? They showed up maybe 5 minutes later. Impressive.

So now that this post has gotten way longer than I ever intended it to be, here's how the rest of it played out. The officer listened to my story, took pics, and said he was going to call my ex to see if he'd tried to get into the house for some reason. If he had, I was told I should explain the "rules" to him about entering the house univited, and if that didn't work, I should file a restraining order. Uh, yeah! If he says he didn't, it was suggested I have the locks changed and I would be assigned a case number as a victim of potential break-in.

Can you guess what happened? Here, let me give you a hint. Sometime between the two birthday parties we have to go to this weekend and all the usual laundry, house cleaning, etc. that is always on the schedule, I now have to either go to one of the big box home improvement stores to buy new locks and try to figure out how in the hell to install them, or I'll be calling a locksmith.

This really wasn't the sort of interesting blog worthy writing I was looking for, but hey. Whatever works, eh?

the sound of silence

I've spent the day by myself, in the deafening silence. Good Lord is it ever quiet here! Stacie hit the "windy city" (literally) almost two hours ago and should be arriving in the "armpit" in a few minutes. The kiddo is staying one more night at his dad's. And I sit alone.

I miss you, my friend!!

What an incredibly awesome birthday weekend this has been! The best in decades. Seriously! I can say that since I've now lived through four of them. LOL You can check out some of the fun on my Flickr site. Can't put anything too incriminating up there though, cuz what happens in WA stays in WA.

I do, however, want to show you this.

He had it done the day before my birthday. Isn't this cool? It's an original from the tat artist. I so wanted one of these to wear for my next 40 years (no, not Groove tattooed across my upper back - something else) but couldn't figure out what I wanted to have, so haven't done anything yet. If ya have any ideas, lemme know cuz I'm definitely gonna go get me one.

Anyway, the party's over and it's back to reality. Tomorrow is yet another interview with yet another (yes, this makes about six) state agency. We'll see.

Alrighty, gotta run and help keep my girl awake on her hour and a half drive home from the airport after getting only about an hour and half of sleep last night. Oh, and I'm still trying to catch up on my blog reading/commenting, so if you haven't heard from me yet, keep your panties on. I'll be there as soon as I can.

Ciao!

the airport, the birthday and silliness

What a great day yesterday! Thanks to all of you sent me birthday wishes through phone, computer or in person. It truly was a fabulous (yes, Groove, I did just use that word) day!!

So lemme back up to Wednesday night when we first picked up Stacie. Amazingly enough her flight made it on time. As we stood in baggage claim watching people come down the escalator, WJ kept saying "I think I see her" and then "Nope, that's not her!". (Remember, this was our first time seeing each other in person.) But as soon as we saw her coming down, Wesley took off running and barely let her get off the escalator, giving her a big hug, followed by me. I had my camera with me, but in all the excitement, didn't even think to pull it out and take any pics. It's too bad we didn't have a third person just standing there capturing the moment, but whatcha gonna do? We made it home by around 10:30pm and tried to get settled since Stace's body clock was three hours ahead and WJ had to go to school the next day.

Now back to yesterday. Stace went with me to drop WJ at school and we made our first Bux run of the trip. LOL Then it was time for beautifying ourselves for the day - easy for her with all that natural beauty she's got. Around 11:30am Groove showed up and we all headed out to lunch at this little place downtown called Tugboat Annie's. With a little food and lots of beer in us, we yaked and laughed and basically did what we normally do when we're on the phone together, except this time we were sitting across the table from each other. Groove dropped us back at the house just in time to go get the kiddo from school.

After letting him play with some of his friends for awhile, and introducing Stace to some of the people she hears me talking about all the time from the school, we made our way home to kick back a bit before going to dinner. She brought this crazy "hairy ball" thing for WJ, and the three of us got a little silly with it playing hot potato, making it into a hat, and pulling it over various other body parts.

Everyone was getting hungy, and the beer was wearing off, so we headed off to the Mayan for dinner. Their food is yummo!! And, of course, they serve so much we had to bring half of it home. Stace took a few goofy shots of WJ and I which is great since we rarely get any shots together. Then it was back home and time for vegging out.

Not sure what the plan is for today yet. Any ideas for us?

A 40 Year Reflective – Part II: The Last 20

Tomorrow I will turn “two twenties” as I like to call it. This is the first milestone birthday I’ve actually looked forward to since turning 21. Looking back at the last 20 years, despite major life changes (both good and bad), I can see just how much I’ve changed, grown, and finally learned to accept myself and all my idiosyncrasies.

My early twenties were spent in and out of school, trying to decide “what I wanted to be when I grew up”. I still haven’t quite figured that one out, but I’ve tried my hand at a variety of things over the years – catering, administrative support, event management, consulting. One of my major regrets is not completing my degree. With only 18 credit hours left to complete, you’d think I would have found a way to do so, but I haven’t. I keep telling myself “Someday I’ll finish”, but that someday just never seems to come. There are a million reasons why I never finished – most I don’t want to discuss here – and I have grown to accept my failure and continue to move forward despite it.

The first 29 years of my life were spent living in California. My parents, in fact, still live in the same house I grew up in. Being the wild and crazy, rebellious woman I was at that time, I met someone on-line and moved to Arizona. It was a new adventure for me, living in another state for the first time in my life, and one that (later) became a real introspective discovery.

The year after moving to Arizona, I married the man I moved for, and we began our life as husband and wife. Little did I know then how many curve balls would be thrown my way in the future. After a miscarriage early in marriage, there was a shift – one that I didn’t see then, but have spent countless hours working through in the past few years. Then, in 2000, we were blessed with the birth of our son. It was then I truly realized what “love at first sight” was. I never knew it was possible to love someone so much, without reservation. Unfortunately, it came with a hefty price – the continued distancing in my relationship with my husband.

In April 2001, through the powers of the military relocation demands, we ended up here, in Washington. A place I felt comfortable having visited countless times growing up. A place I knew would be a place to start “anew”. Only I didn’t know the whole world would be starting anew along side me on September 11th. My husband was deployed to the Middle East just 15 days before the attacks, and I was left to fly solo with a one year old toddler. It was preparation I would need for the future.

He returned the following year, and exactly a year and a day after his return, he was deployed again. After another safe return, the shift had grown to epic proportions. We were no longer a family, as family should be. We were no longer husband and wife, as partners. We were simply two individuals living different lives in the same existence. I am still uncertain whether this shift was a continuation of the shift from the early years of our marriage, or whether the perils of war were too much for us to sustain, but we didn’t sustain – and it ended.

In April 2004, ironically exactly 3 years ago today, I found myself faced with being a single parent, without more than an Associates degree, and not having worked out of the home for four years. It was the most painful, scary time of my life, feeling completely lost and alone. The one thing that was both a curse and a blessing was my son. Though I would never, ever even remotely consider him a curse, the simple fact of having him to care for and worry about prevented me from just picking up and moving on with my life without having to take his well being into consideration. But, without him, I would never be the same person I am today – stronger, wiser, more attentive.

I firmly believe that all things in life happen for a reason. It has taken me years to truly embrace that idea, but with the love and support of many friends and family, I do. Without my ex, I wouldn’t have my wonderful son. Without my son, I likely wouldn’t have met my dear friend Stacie. Without being forced to find work, I wouldn’t have met Groove, or any of the other people I still keep in contact with from my last job. And without all of these changes, both good and bad, I would not be the same woman I’ve become in my “two twenties”.

tick tock tick tock tick tock

Today's the day!!!

WOOHOO!!!!!!

Stacie will be on her way in just a few hours, and then it's PARTY time!!

Stay tuned for fun and adventure.

I rock! and the countdown clock

A few month's ago, I met Elizabeth over at Table for Five. It was her 40th birthday, and feeling a kinship with my 'two 20's' just around the corner (April 19th), I posted a "Happy Birthday" message to her. Since then, we've traded emails and commented on each other's blogs. She also helped me get started with the PPP program. She's an amazing woman. If you don't believe me, check out her site and read her "100 Things About Me".

Earlier in the week, she announced the "Elizabeth thinks I ROCK!" award. And yesterday, she gave one to me! Heehee!! My first blog award. Really I think it's Elizabeth who rocks, but if she wants to think I rock too, I'll proudly display my award. Thanks girl! You made my day!!

While you're looking at the sidebar admiring my new award, check out the countdown clock. Only 3 more days until Stacie gets here!!! Holy crow that time went by fast! I am SO freakin' psyched!! That also means only 4 more days till the "BIG 4-0" for me. Afterall, that's the reason I finally got her to come out here after practically begging for the past 2 years. For those of you who don't already know, Stace and I have been friends for the past four years -- but we've never had the opportunity to meet in person before this. For real. We've been through hell and back, together, with various hurdles in our lives. We've talked for hours on end over IM and on the phone. But this is the first time in four years that we'll be sitting in the same room dishin' it.

We pretty much don't have any plans except for making several Starbuck's runs and going out to lunch with Groove on my birthday. So, in the spirit of Sizzle and Karl's recent visit, I'm gonna jump on their idea of taking pics and open it up to ya'll -- tell me where you'd like to have pics of Stacie while she's hangin' here with me?

wednesday wrap-up

How is it Wednesday already? But, more important, how is it NOT Friday yet? Life seems to be on fast-forward this week. I'm sure it's mostly due to me making the commitment to some major life changes this past weekend.

One thing I decided needed more attention from me is WJ. So last weekend was spent for the most part doing stuff with him. On Saturday we went out to lunch, then hit the two major bookstores where we both had gift cards from Christmas. Stace had told me about this kid's cookbook put out by Rachael Ray she'd picked up for Michael earlier in the week, so we started our hunt with that. It's really cool, and has a bunch of great recipes broken out into age groups for the kids to pretty much do most of the food prep and/or cooking. Our first recipe, made on Sunday, was Ria's Double-Chips Cookies with Peanut Butter and Chocolate Chips. In the words of Rachael... yummo! And the best part is there's no eggs in these so we baked up the first half and threw the rest of the dough in the fridge to bake up later this week. As you can see, WJ had a blast. We also picked up an assortment of other books for the both of us and spent quite a bit of time reading throughout the weekend.

And my reading is what brought me to my other commitment to changes. I picked up Bob Greene's Get With the Program. How could I pass it up when it was only $3.99 in the reduced section? Seriously, the main reason I got it was for the section on "emotional eating". I've always known I was an emotional eater, but wasn't really ready to admit it. Well, now I am. You can read about my attempts at getting my ass in gear over at my new blog, Girl Redefined.

So what else did I want to tell you? Hmm. Oh yeah, there's 49 days till party time!!! Woot!! I'm not really excited about it, or anything. Hehe!

Oh yeah. An update on my last post. So, I took Stacie's advise and we made a chore chart last night. Printed it up, hung it on the fridge, and agreed on a price. You'll love this conversation.

"So, looking at all the chores for the week, how much do you think they're all worth?"

"A hundred bucks!?" he said with a grin a mile wide.

I laughed out loud and said, "Uh, notsomuch! Seriously, how much do you think it's worth?"

After a few rounds of "Maybe $95" etc. I finally said, "Well, let me tell you what I would have gotten for all this. About $2.50." I think he was pretty shocked. So then I suggested $6.00 a week - one dollar for year he is old.

"How about $6.50 since I'm really 6 1/2!"

Have I mentioned my kid's gonna be a politician?

bras, panties, and other assorted feminine things

I am in love!

Yes, you heard me. In love!!

No, not with the girl pictured to the right, though she is stunning. I'm in love with the bra she's wearing. It's one from Vicky's Angels by VS Secret Embrace line. I got two - Poinsettia Red and Black. Okay, mine don't have the cutesy little butterflies on them, just a soft floral applique on the one side, nor do I look as hot and sexy as she does wearing them, but seriously, these are the MOST comfortable bras I've ever owned. And you want to know the best part? Saving $25. That's right - $25 off and a pair of free panties. How can you go wrong with that?

Speaking of panties, good Lord. Could there be any more options out there to choose from? I mean really. Bikinis. Boyshorts. Hiphuggers. Briefs. And my personal favorite - Thongs. Watch this then read on. And don't keep reading figuring you don't need to watch the video, or will watch it later. Look at it now or my story won't be nearly as funny. Even if you've seen it before because I'm sure it's been floating around the internet for awhile now, watch it again.

Okay, see ya in a minute.


Kotex Classic - video powered by Metacafe

Did you watch the video? Don't lie to me. I hate liars. Okay, well then let me tell you a funny story now that you've seen it.

So, I got this video sent to me in email earlier this week from my friend Terri. I then sent it on to a few more friends, including Stacie, who incidently will be here in 59 days. Well Stacie and I, doing what we do best, started talking about the video and laughing our asses off.

I said, "You know what kills me about that video? The clips where the girls are wearing low rise pants and the straps are sticking out the top - like how some girls wear their thongs today." She laughed and said, "I know. It's freakin' hysterical!"

As I said above, my personal favorite style of panties are thongs. Well this video, and my comment, got me going on a complete tangent about thong panties hanging out the back of low-rise pants. I mean really! Is it so hard to adjust your panties so they aren't hanging out? It reminds me of when the guys started wearing their pants ten sizes too big so they were practically hanging off the bottom of their butt cheeks while their boxers poured out over the top of the waist band that was strategically tied with a rope or something just so they wouldn't end up at their ankles. Talk about a poor fashion statement.

So now, here are these girls watching the tacky, bimbos like Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan sporting their thong panties pulled fully up their butt cracks so they can be seen hanging out of the back of their ultra low-rise pants. Yes, I'm aware that sometimes when sitting or bending the pants will shift and a bit of the thong panty sticks out over the top, but when you're in an upright position and you see more panty than you should see showing like some sort of tasteless fashion statement, ugh. Really. It's ridiculous.

Of course there is one thing worse than showing off your thong panties. That would be sporting no panties at all. Why, oh why, would girls want to go au naturale under their jeans? Good Lord. I don't know about you, but I wear my jeans to fit. No, they're not painted on, but they fit around all the curves and places they're supposed to. And where do you think the biggest seam in a pair of jeans is? And not only one, but two seams joining together?? Right in the kootch. That's right. Right were if you walk, or sit, or bend the right direction and keep subtly moving around you're likely to find it a pleasurable sensation and then... oooh... aaahh. Um, yeah. All over your jeans. Not. So. Much. If want to walk around pleasuring yourself might I suggest this. It works much better for whenever you want to "make it happy".

But please. Wear some damn panties.

sixty-nine baby!!!

Hehe! That would be sixty-nine days until Stacie arrives!! What were you thinking I was talking about? Get your mind out of the gutter. Sheesh!

Other notable events for today include my friend since we were 5 years old, Denise's 40th birthday. Haha! You're 40 before me!! Happy Birthday girl! And my parents' 44th wedding anniversary. Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad! Damn! Can you imagine being married to the same person for that long? I don't know how they've done it but I'm amazed. And it's also Ms. Sizzle's two year anniversary of her first blog. See, got my party hat on for ya girl!!

Somewhat non-notable events for the day include WJ still being sick. Me still looking for a job. Oh, and Survivor Fiji starting tonight! I should have set up a Survivor pool. Damn, I always think about these things too late.

And now your Joke of the Day...

Saul: Do you believe that television causes violence?
Paul: Sure - my kids are always fighting over which shows to watch.

Monday again? Part III

Not exactly the most productive Monday I've had. And very long considering I was up at 4:48am. I guess that's what happens when you sleep like the dead for the first three hours of the night. Early wake-up call. I shouldn't complain though. I'd rather be on the sleep like the dead, early wake-up schedule than the can't keep my eyes open past 9:30pm schedule. That just bugs me.

On a good note, it's been an extremely funny day, so that should count for something. Yes? My girl Stacie and I laughed it up pretty good this morning. One subject after another. We even tormented poor Groove for awhile there apparently making his head spin. Now that's something I would have paid money to actually see!

Speaking of funny, did you watch the Super Bowl yesterday? Not the game. That was pitiful. After the opening runback, it just went down hill. Did you watch the commercials? Seeing all the new commercials is always the best part. For the most part, I was really disappointed this year. I'd already seen a bunch of them, and most of the others weren't worth a damn. Except for this one. It was hys-FREAKIN-terical!!!



And I must not forget the Joke of the Day!

Waiter, waiter
Max: Waiter, this soup tastes like sewer water!
Waiter: How do you know?

On that note, time to get the kiddo some grub. With lots of tomatoes!

someone pinch me!

They say bad things happen in 3's, right? Well they usually do in my life at least. What about good things?? Do they happen in 3's too? If so, then I'm due one more good thing. But I'm insanely happy with the two I just received yesterday, so if there's no 3 I'm fine with it.

As you can see from yesterday's post, my super incredible friend Stacie is coming out to see me in April! (WOOOOHOOOO!!!!) For those of you who don't know our background, Stacie and I met several years ago at an on-line scrapping forum. We became friends, and over the last few years have gone through SO much together - good, bad, happy, sad, and everything in between. But we've never had the chance to actually be in the same place at the same time. At some point in the last week I said, "So you'd better get going on booking that trip for April!" or some other sassy tease. (Why April? Because I'll be officially crossing into another decade of years I've graced the earth with my presence.)

Yesterday started off like any other except that WJ's class was finally performing the short play they were supposed to have done before Christmas vacation, so I promised him I would go and watch. (It was very cute, but I'll do another post on that later.) Shortly after getting home I called my girl, Stacie, to see how her day was going, and the conversation went something like this:

Me: Hey, what's going on?
Stacie: Same ole. How's your day?
Me: Good....
Stacie: Hey... I've got a question for you!
Me: OK, shoot.
Stacie: What are you doing at 9:10PM Wednesday, April 18th?
Me: Hopefully picking up your ass from the Seattle airport!? (oozing sassiness)
Stacie: That's not too late? (giggle giggle)
Me: What??? Are you serious??? OMG!!!!!!!!!!!
Stacie: (laughing)
Me: OMG!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, you get the gist. She was booking the flight while on the phone with me and I was bouncing off the walls. Once she got the flight booked and my feet were on the ground again, I got to hear how she hit up Steve to make the trip. (She's very tricky!) Thank you Steve!!!! You rock!! And thanks Stacie's mom (can't remember if Stacie's ever actually used her mom's real name on her blog, so I won't throw it out there just in case she hasn't) for watching the kids so Stace can make this trip "kid free" (of course, they are always welcome to come!).

I spent the rest of the morning and afternoon floating on air. What a great way to start my 2007! A few hours later I ran out to do some errands and meet up with a friend for a couple hours. On my way home, I decided to call and check my voicemail (can't miss any of my fans calling! lol). There was one new message. And what do I hear?

"Hello, this is (state worker's name) calling from the (state agency's name). We would like you to come in on Thursday for an interview......." OMG!! I almost drove off the road. Two awesome phone calls in one day!

At the beginning of December I'd finally gotten off my ass and uploaded all my info into the state's new on-line hiring system. The Friday before New Year's, I'd received an email from one of the agencies asking me to complete an additional questionnaire for one of the posted jobs, so I was optimistic that someone was actually looking at my stuff. And now this call from yet another agency! Someone pinch me!!

I called State Worker back, but since it was Friday at 4:15PM I didn't expect to get her. Which was right. So, I left a message and am now waiting on a return call on Monday with the time and location. But I HAVE AN INTERVIEW!!! And with "the State" no less!

Well, that was my Friday! If my weekend ends up completely uneventful, it won't matter cuz yesterday rocked and two out of three ain't bad odds!!

WooooooFREAKINhooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

Do you see the counter? Over there on the sidebar! Take a look.

It's counting down to PARTY time!!

What party, you ask?

The forking HUGE party my girl Stacie and I are gonna have when she arrives here in Seattle!!!

WooooooFREAKINhooooooo!!!!!!!!!!