Name of Mission: Operation No More Shit (ONMS)
Mission Goal: Return shit to offender without being seen
Background:
On Tuesday, May 2, 2007, shit was discovered on sidewalk crossing driveway of complainant's home. Previous sightings of shit in the same general locale, matching in description, were sighted on Friday, March 30.
Suspects:
Duke. The neighbor dog of the complainant.
Evidence:
Shit collected by the complainant matching in size and description to that sighted on previous complaint.Action Required to Complete Mission Goal:
Deliver said shit to neighbor's front doorstep in the dark of night.
[Update: Mission complete. Bag deposited on hood of trunk. As of this morning, bag has fallen over and shit has fallen out onto the trunk and bumper. Mission successful.]
