salt & pepper

I don't know much about politics. I don't talk politics. I don't read about politics. I don't watch political debates on teevee. Some would say I prefer to have my head in the sand, but, honestly, it just bores the crap out of me. Apparently only until I get recruited to campaign that is.

Somehow, despite my distaste for the bullshit of listening to people fluff their egos by embellishing their accomplishments, make false promises that they not only don't intend to keep but most likely couldn't keep even if they wanted, I found myself on a campaign team - read as a witch hunt clan - for one of the candidates running for our school board. The election having been postponed for two weeks after the school endured a flu epidemic and closed early for the Memorial Day weekend was finally held this past Thursday.

A little history about the past board: Can you say Old Boy's Club? The only thing they ever did was say "no" to any and every idea for change that was proposed. Topics that were supposed to be on monthly meeting agendas conveniently fell off the schedule. Questions that were asked were met with the standard "We'll look into that" and never followed up. When personal contact was attempted throughout the school year, parents were berated with such statements as "I'm a very busy man. I don't have time to sit in front of my email answering questions from everyone." WTH?

The board has six seats that serve out three year terms - two of which came open this year. There were four candidates running. Actually there were five up until the morning of the election, but one of the chickenshit candidates backed out at the last minute.

Let's meet the candidates:

Mr. P (incumbent) - Decorated military career. Academic career. No children at the school. Delusional thinking that there's nothing to worry about when enrollment drops over 25% in one year. Attempts to answer questions by repeating his ego fluff then wonders why the voters are staring at him like he's just spouted like Vesuvius.

Mr. L (our candidate) - Businessman with 14 years customer service management experience. One child in attendance, two more to be enrolled in the coming years. Well spoken. Forward thinking. Nailed each and every question with complete answers.

Mrs. S (our other candidate) - Single parent of one student. Previous high school teacher. Current state worker. Direct. Focused. Problem solver. Oh, and by the way... female.

Mr. B - Asshole extraordinaire! Husband to staff member. Grandfather to student involved in previous scandal. All questions are responded to with a joke, a story, or "Let me ask you a question". That is until he decides it's past his bedtime at 8pm and calls for the questioning to stop and the votes to be cast. Refuses to respond to any additional questions for the next half hour.

At 8:30pm the votes were cast, tallied (by yours truly, the principal, and two current board members) and the results are announced. Mrs. S and Mr. P win the election. Hmm! Maybe I should start referring to them as Mrs. Salt and Mr. Pepper? That pretty much describes their personalities - complete opposites.

It's complete bullshit that Mr. Pepper was reelected! How people can sit and watch the inactions of the current board and feel they've done a single thing to make the school better, then vote to have one of the main opposers to change reelected is beyond me? Now that's what I call having your head in the sand.

Mrs. Salt has a hard job awaiting her. Not only is she the only female, she's the first female in a decade and will be up against the OBC. The clan will be there to support her. Whether that'll be enough, only time will tell.

Mr. B can kiss my ass!

Poor Mr. L, who put an enormous amount of time and energy into his campaign. Well, there's always next year when another seat will be up.

And people think I know nothing about politics. Ha!